Hi everyone! I was in a HRDF training the entire week and recently conducted a talk with Top Glove; it looks like I’ll be stepping into an enterprise training role even as I continue my work to educate the students of the new era, and I’m looking forward to seeing what’s to come!
Anyway, here are two free sample essays for you for this week! Enjoy the sample essays – one is a narrative essay, and the other is a descriptive essay 🙂
Essay:
Prompt: Write a story with the title, ‘An unexpected meeting.’
Essay:
In the heart of a bustling city, perched high above the murmuring streets and echoing sirens, was my apartment. I considered it an urban sanctuary. There, the world felt smaller, softer. The morning was in full bloom, the city humming beneath a dome of cerulean sky. I was at my writing desk, scribing my thoughts, when a knock resounded from my door.
Intrigued, I peered through the peephole. An unfamiliar face greeted me – a woman, older, the contours of her face etched with experiences. Her deep-set eyes shimmered with an inexplicable familiarity. I opened the door cautiously, curiosity piqued.
“Hello, I’m sure you don’t recognize me. I’m Clara, an old friend of your mother’s,” she said. Her voice was as soft as a lullaby, and it stirred something within me, an echo of a memory perhaps too distant to recall.
Inviting Clara in, I brewed us some coffee as she began to unravel the tapestry of a time gone by. She painted a vivid picture of a youthful version of my mother. Their adventures, their dreams, their heartaches – it was a side of my mother I had never known, a side that was put aside when she donned the mantle of motherhood.
Over the next few hours, Clara’s narratives breathed life into a legacy. The woman I knew as my mother was more than the person who raised me – she was a dreamer, an adventurer, a best friend. Through Clara’s words, I felt an overwhelming connection to her and a new understanding of my mother.
As the afternoon light waned, painting the city with hues of twilight, Clara rose to leave. Our unexpected meeting had stirred a wellspring of emotions, evoking a sense of profound connection to a past I had never known and a woman I had known my entire life. Clara’s visit wasn’t just a knock on the door. It was an invitation to a broader understanding of my roots, my history, and ultimately, myself. I was left with a renewed appreciation for my mother, her experiences, and the woman she once was.
As I watched Clara’s silhouette merge with the city’s twilight, I felt closer to my mother, even though she was no longer with us. And while I returned to my writing desk, the world didn’t feel quite as small as before. I realized that unexpected meetings might carry the most extraordinary revelations, woven into the most ordinary moments.
Comment:
The essay opens with an engaging setting and introduction (W1), taking readers immediately into the heart of the protagonist’s sanctuary. The unexpected meeting with Clara acts as a trigger to the main plot, unfolding the memories and history of the protagonist’s mother (W2).
Language use is compelling and precise throughout, creating vivid images of characters, setting, and emotions (W3). There’s a consistent tone and register, fitting well with the reflective and introspective narrative (W4). While some sentences could be shorter to increase readability, grammar, spelling, and punctuation are accurate (W5).
The writer could learn from authors like Alice Munro, who masterfully blends everyday life with intricate emotions and revelations in her short stories.
Mark awarded for content and structure = 16/16
Mark awarded for style and accuracy = 24/24
Total marks awarded = 40/40
Prompt: Describe the view from a window on a wet day.
Essay:
The view from my window was transformed into a melancholic watercolour masterpiece. Raindrops traced their course down the windowpane, reminiscent of myriad tiny races in progress, their paths weaving into rivulets against the pane’s frosty glass surface. Each droplet distorted the world beyond, bending light and life into surreal, dreamy images. It was as if time itself had slowed, choosing to linger in this rain-soaked world.
Outside, it was an orchestra of wetness, a symphony composed by nature itself. Droplets leaped from one leaf to another, swaying in rhythm with the wailing wind. The evergreen trees, usually painted with vibrant hues of life, now stood veiled in shades of melancholic gray, their leaves burdened with the weight of the ceaseless rain, their proud barks darkened.
The streets lay bare and washed, stripped of their everyday hustle, mirroring the overcast sky in the puddles that stood as silent witnesses to the rainfall. They appeared vacant, devoid of the usual vibrancy and human touch, save for the few umbrella-dotted figures that occasionally darted across, leaving a trail of rain-ripples in their wake.
Puddles formed miniature lakes on the pavement, their reflective surfaces mimicking the sullen clouds above. The distant buildings, once a testament to the city’s architectural grandeur, were reduced to mere silhouettes through the rain-draped haze, adding to the day’s melancholic appeal.
From the rooftops, the rivulets gathered momentum, cascading down with an unspoken fervour, weaving a curtain of water that veiled the world beyond. They pulsed with a life of their own, creating a transient waterfall that warped and distorted the view of the rain-drenched cityscape beyond.
Inside, I held my hot coffee close, its aroma mingling with the petrichor wafting in from the wet earth, forming an olfactory symphony that was unique to these rain-laden days. I was privy to a world subtly reshaped by the rain’s gentle touch, a world where the ordinary was made extraordinary.
The view from the window offered a myriad of details to admire. Despite the rain’s melancholic demeanor, there was a strange comfort to it all. Each aspect of the panorama outside was a testament to the transformative power of rain, a captivating spectacle of life slowed down, an echo of nature’s timeless ballet.
Word Count: 404
Comment:
The essay effectively begins ‘in media res,’ immediately drawing the reader into the scene of a rain-soaked landscape (W2). It employs sensory imagery to create a vivid and engaging description of a rainy day, from the raindrops on the windowpane to the smell of coffee and petrichor (W1).
Phrases like “an orchestra of wetness”, “mirroring the overcast sky in the puddles”, and “an echo of nature’s timeless ballet” effectively convey the atmospheric mood of the scene and exhibit a well-chosen vocabulary, used for effect (W3).
The sentence structure varies and demonstrates intent, providing both an overall impression of the scene and attention to intimate details. The essay maintains an appropriate, consistent register suitable for a descriptive composition, with clear transitions that maintain flow and coherence (W4).
Spelling, punctuation, and grammar are accurate throughout the essay, further demonstrating proficiency (W5).
Mark awarded for content and structure = 16/16
Mark awarded for style and accuracy = 23/24
Total marks awarded = 39/40
